Memories
by Jaina Sanri
Summary: Jaina thinks of her dead husband finished


Memories

ok.... lyrics belong to Enya- the song "fallen Embers" is hers. the characters/planets/everything but the idea belong to ppl who rnt me.   
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Jaina Solo looked up into the sky at the stars. Up there the love of her life had died and she couldn't do anything about it. Grounded do to pregnancy, her husband of four years had gone into battle like always. Now that child was five, and she had still never met another man like her husband.   
  
He had been able to lighten up her life. He was able to bring her out of a slump and up into the heights of true love. With the war going on, they had both been lucky for many years until that fateful battle when his luck had run out. Jaina had never been able to think about that day. In the pain it brought her, she had blocked it out of her memory. But with her assignment back to Dathomir, all the feelings that had been locked away for so long suddenly came back to her.   
  
The love for her husband shone out in front of all else, and she could almost feel him next to her. The evening wedding, when the night seemed to last forever, stood out in contrast to her latest memories. Views of the stars from space came back to her. For the past five years, Jaina Solo hadn't flown herself or her daughter anywhere. She had stayed in the Maw with the Jedi children until she was ordered to return to the one place she hated. The one place that would force her to remember.   
  
_Once, as my heart remember,   
All the stars were fallen embers.   
Once, when night seemed forever   
I was with you. _  
  
Jaina remembered waking up with her husband on the watch of the morning sun. The memory of the way his strong arms protected her caused a tear to fall down her face. The first tear for her husband's death, five years after. And as that tear dropped to the floor, the sun came up. That same sun that had shone on them so many years ago evaporated the tear into the air.   
  
Once she had loved flying, but now Jaina simply didn't know how. The cockpit of a fighter was no longer familiar and the air was no longer her calling. With each memory, more tears fell, only to be evaporated from her face. Remembering the green eyes of her husband, she realized how much Anni looked like her father.   
  
_Once, in the care of morning   
In the air was all belonging.   
Once, when that day was dawning.   
I was with you. _  
  
Looking at the sunrise, Jaina was the only figure on the hilltop. The light bathed her in a glow, putting her figure in contrast with both the darkness behind her and the light in front of her. Remembering a time 6 years ago on their third anniversary, Jaina fell back into the memory.   
  
**_"How far away is morning?"   
"Why? You want it to end?"   
"Nope. I never want it to end."   
"It never will." _**  
  
_How far we are from morning   
How far we are   
And the stars shining through the darkness,   
Falling in the air._   
  
As the night completely left the ridge, more figures started to come out of the small compound and Jaina went inside against the tide. Arriving at a familiar door, Jaina punched in a code. Laying down on the small bed, Jaina Solo felt the absence of her husband for the first time in 5 years.   
  
The comfort of his presence next to her was missed for the first time instead of being forgotten. The bed seemed strangely large and the dark room seemed strangely quiet.   
  
Once, dreams centered around her husband. Scenes of them laughing and making a family together flashed before her eyes in slumber. For the past five years, no dreams had come. The darkness of her eyelids was all she ever saw. Now, in a deep sleep, the subconscious thoughts returned.   
  
**_"Kia, Tran! Time to go home."   
"MOM, come on. 30 more minutes, please…."   
"You just want to stay with Liu. You never like the beach. I swear dad, she might actually like him for once."   
"Shut up, Tran."   
"Kids, listen to your mother. She's right. Time to go home. Tran, stop teasing your sister, and Kia- play with Liu another day." _**  
  
_Once, as the night was leaving   
Into us our dreams were weaving.   
Once, all dreams were worth keeping.   
I was with you. _  
  
Dream after dream flashed in the mind of the sleeping woman until the alarm went off. After many, many years, Jaina Solo went to a Hanger in the far reaches of the cave system that was only accessible with a password. There, sitting as it always was, was a white X-wing with running voxyn on the sides. Climbing up the ladder, the youngest ace ever became one with her cockpit once again and roared out of the hanger out into the sky of Dathomir.   
  
_Once, when our hearts were singing,   
I was with you. _  
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End file.
